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Following on from yesterday’s open letter, Dear Hypomanic Wife (with basic attempt at poetry), I wanted to figure out a picture of what my wife is like when she’s stable, to compare to when she is in the other states of depression, anxiety and particularly hypomania.  Numerous personal accounts from people suffering from bipolar disorder II, report that this process of self-discovery can take many, many years, so I realize that this is just the beginning…

When moods fluctuate rapidly and unpredictability, it puts alot of strain on any relationship.  So the key question is What is the “Normal Lee” and What is the disorder?  Fundamental issue for creating a holistic wellness plan.

Amazingly, I was able to plant a seed about this concept a couple days ago… it was a really interesting discussion.  I actually framed it a little differently, posing the following question: what states / characteristics would she not miss, if we could magically remove ‘the condition’?  This naturally led to the discussion, about what’s ‘the condition’ vs her normal personality (below), but it wasn’t surprising: we wouldn’t miss the periods of intense depression, anxiety and paranoia about social triggers (obviously). Also, she wouldn’t mind being less unfocussed, ‘floaty’ or excessively impulsive, which has commonly led to shame or embarrassment afterwards and less irritable / reactive with family tension situations.